_3 am_

I
awake
in blackness
3 am alone
bleak

my
memory dances
flashes of you
whisper of a smile
wink of an eye

the
soft caress
of thigh
and touch
of velvet skin

and
my soul
writhes and twitches
to the tempo
of a remembered heartbeat

so
i walk alone
in pain
in a waking hell
of my own making

and
i do not wish
to live without you
but i am not yet
allowed to die

now
i do not know
how i go on
or how i can be whole
without you

perhaps
some day
i will reach out
take back my soul
and walk away
alone

Link to _rememberance_ (a follow on poem written at the same time)

Written by "Buffy", sometime in late 1990